...the point of no return...

Friday, May 29, 2009

Crossroads..?

Been feeling rather emotional of late. Here I am, typing this with some emo mo mo song playing in the background so softly I don't even know what song it is.

I have taught for 3 full years now. I've grown attached to this job. This is probably my calling. But I'm not prepared to give up everything I've dreamed of becoming, for this. Am I selfish, I ask myself more frequently than the normal. I reckon everyone wants to do what he/she wants to and I'm rather blessed to be in a position where I can actually take charge of my life now and decide what I want to do.
But there's this niggling feeling somewhat, that I've let someone down, that I've kind of abandoned something, or somebody and I can't get rid of this feeling.

On another note, a short conversation I had with close friends I've not seen for a while, set me off thinking again, that often, it's hard to break away from things that're not in your control. Its unfair and it might not be worth your trouble, effort and sacrifices.

I feel weak, whenever I get this feeling of haplessness. I am a strong believer of my abilities and the amount of resilience, determination, fighting spirit and drive I naturally possess have served me well in thrusting me ahead in life.

But right now, I feel hapless.

Maybe i'm just being emo mo mo.

Maybe not.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Perturbed and Desolate

"more than half of them have decided to pull out"

Dropped on me like a bombshell.
I do not understand.
How could you guys decide to hurt us like this.

You don't abandon your family.
I am appealing to your heart.
Don't disappoint your pals, your brothers and sisters.
Don't disappoint me.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Reflections, Introspection, Affirmation

It has been a hectic, stressful and physically emotionally mentally draining month.
I've quite a bit to say but I'm tired.

SYF with ajchoir.
Economics symposium.


I'd bump it for the time being.
Be back later.

Monday, May 04, 2009

No Importa La Distancia

Probably my last SYF with them.
No regrets.
Sing, Feel, Love.